he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
My glasses are somewhere in your living room. Also, my underwear might be in your bathroom or on or around your porch. Sorry.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
Randomize
