so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I was trying to fart in my sleep in the hopes that he would leave
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
