perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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