we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
He's drunk and putting on a tie for the jimmy john's delivery guy
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
i think we sleep fucked last night...
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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