that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
hes totally cute, too bad i slept with his father
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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