i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize
