Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Randomize
