Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
besides i was ending his dry spell. it's written in the bible that jesus likes that right?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
