I think i sorta joined a cult last night
hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
