My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
I told my manager that I would be coming in to work either high from edibles on purpose or tripping on acid by accident so he knows to check my work tomorrow.
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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