my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
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