PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
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