I had a dream last night where you were a transsexual in a low cut blue dress with lovely long brown hair. You were very pretty. I hope you are well.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
Randomize
