no one should ever give us hovercrafts
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Remember, today is also the anniversary of Harambe's death. D**** out.
Randomize
