I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
Randomize
