It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
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