somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
