i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize
