Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
She can't brag about all the anal sex she has and then expect me not to awkwardly stare at her boyfriend when she brings him around
She kissed me, then said "mmm your face tastes like it needs my pussy on it."
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
