she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
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