have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
