How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
He managed to completely creep out every girl I was with last night. It was almost inspiring how efficient it was.
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
I also slapped not one but two bananas on the ass, twerked in public, and I think I made out with someone
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
