i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Saturday evening, however, will be my vodka and bubble wrap extravaganza.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
He shit in the fireplace
Right now I'm laying face down on my carpet in my living room in the darkness sending work emails from my phone.
It's a glamorous life.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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