If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
Randomize