Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Randomize