just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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