I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
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