a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
He stole a bottle of grenadine from the bar. And got arrested. His new cell mate is going to love his bright red lips.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
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