Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I gave up sex with dolphins for you.
You were right. It hurts to walk today.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
