I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
