Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
its the kind of pain that only someone with a fucking elephant on their head would understand. I'm never drinking again.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
Randomize
