you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Whoever I saved in my phone as "Jackpot" last night has your keys.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
