my number is 615-555-1212, <3 your favorite asshole
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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