Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
don't judge my taste in strippers
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
Randomize
