I molested 6 butterflies tonight
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
Randomize
