If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
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