Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
He's a prodigy! It would be a service to the scientific community.
15 is 15
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
Randomize
