i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
i was drunk and our names rhymed...what was i supposed to do?
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I have aggressive nipples.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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