I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
Watching the 1st game of the world cup. I'll drunk dial you at 8:30 to wake you up for work.
Taped crackers to the wall. Sat I'n the dryer. Bobby had to pull me out by my hair. No more.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
