We're like a lot better than the average bears
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
there's no toilet paper. I'm using wheat bread.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
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