The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
she told me i tasted like america
Why do my balls have what looks like rust on them?
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
Dropping the entire last roll of TP into the toilet is a hurt you don't want to know.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
