You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
Randomize
