i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Randomize
