a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
Randomize
