Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
My vagina has officially become a vortex for sexually confused frat guys.
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
The stripper was dressed as the green lantern. Even for a geeky girls' bachelorette party it was lame ass.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
Randomize
