You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
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