TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
