He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I need a sign that says “please don’t make plans with me if I’ve had two or more drinks. I will regret them. I will have bitter feelings towards you. Then I will cancel and feel guilty.”
Randomize
