Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize