So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Like an undercooked grilled cheese that got cold again. But hairy.
And there goes my desire for sandwiches. Forever.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Randomize
